Medicine is a crazy, innocence-losing mind-trip into the unknown yet perpetually predictable world of ego-driven type-A overachievers and the loonies they care for. You are constantly forced to suppress who you are... your feelings and thoughts always closely contained in that shell of superficial coldness. Desires erased. Hedonistic tendencies bubbling constantly under the surface simply to maintain some semblance of life and vitality.

I'm alive.

But I can't show you. It wouldn't be appropriate. I'm forced into mindless risk-taking in order to prove to myself that I'm not completely numb.